Guarded.

I don’t even want to let anyone get that close ever again. It’s all an illusion; the feeling of it being genuine. This isn’t a game, how could it be treated as such? Now you’re hurting, left constantly seeking answers, searching for the closure that doesn’t exist because you let down your walls. You took a chance and it made you realize why you’ve been so guarded this entire time.. That one person you thought was different proved to be worse than the rest. You feel weak because you allowed them to gain control of your emotions, to make you hate yourself. You feel weak because you allowed someone to break you. You feel weak because even through all of this, you still miss them. You still reminisce on the good times and you replay the memories just trying to figure out where it all went wrong. What did I do to make you act this way? How did we get here? Can I fix it? Can we go back to how it used to be? The foundation is tarnished, but the thought still lingers.

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